Time only makes me miss you more!

6 05 2014

To Amy with love from your husband Don

Sweetie,

They say things get better with time. I really don’t believe that. I spend my days thinking you weren’t done. You had so much more to do here. Teaching Theo all the great things in the world, your books that you had done in your mind but had not yet put them on paper and the plans we had for our future. Time only makes me miss you that much more. That’s what time does. 730 days without you. It’s not fair. You visit all your loved ones as a cardinal. I look but I don’t see you. I see you in my dreams all the time and you are carrying on as if you never left and I can’t believe you are back. I never get to ask what now, what do I do now! I’m in survival mode.  This isn’t living because being with you was living. I’m in the fast lane for sure. I can’t feel anymore. There is no emotion but sadness. I try to be happy but you made me happy, you gave me purpose.

Theo has been talking a lot about you the last month or so.  He loves asking me about how you would do some things. And usually when he is asking that question he is doing or saying something exactly how you would of. All I can do at that point is smile and tell him how much I love him and how much you loved him. I hope you come to him in his dreams as well and give him guidance. He is doing very well in school and hockey.  You would be a proud mom as I am a proud dad.

I’m not ready to let you go. I can’t, I won’t. I miss you every day.

I will always love you,

Don

Image  Image  Image

Advertisements

Actions

Information

20 responses

6 05 2014
Carrie Neilson

Oh Don, I just want to HUG you. You mean so much to us and Theo. We miss Amy too, she was and still is such a special person to everyone who had the pleasure of knowing her. Hang in there 🙂

7 05 2014
Don

Thank you Carrie.

6 05 2014
Tisha Walker

I never had the pleasure of meeting Amy. I knew she was special by reading her blog and listening to Don talk about her. I know that she is so proud of you both Don! Big hug from me too!

7 05 2014
Don

Thank you Tisha. She was amazing.

6 05 2014
Mark Robertson (@manifestinvest)

For me, the day is November 29 — our shared birthday. Amy and I often corresponded on *our day* and that’s the day I remember her Better Investing collaborations. Thanks for the Theo update, Don. Amy is alive in everything he has done, does … and will do.

7 05 2014
Don

Yes Mark, some of what that kid says I no she is putting in his head!

6 05 2014
Paul Vachon

Don, I feel deeply for you and Theo. I can’t even begin to imagine how heavy your burden must be.

7 05 2014
Don

Thank you Paul.

6 05 2014
sheri torch

What a beautiful heart felt letter to our special Amy. She had an impact on everyone she met and her biggest impact was on you and Theo. I can’t imagine your heavy heart but I know how much we miss her too.

7 05 2014
Don

Yes Sheti, I feel for everyone that misses her. What a big loss for everyone.

6 05 2014
Elizabeth DeWaard

Don and Theo, My heart just aches for both of you and I know how difficult it must be just to get through each day. It doesn’t seem like it’ll ever get better, but it will—just very slowly. You’re doing all the right things, stay strong and know you’re surrounded by love.
Betsy

7 05 2014
Don

Thanks Betsy,
We are for sure coming to see you soon!!

6 05 2014
Helene Rabinowitz

Don and Theo you are in my thoughts often. Amy, never forgotten.

7 05 2014
Don

Thank you Helene.

6 05 2014
Leslie Dietz

Dear Don and Theo – I don’t know you and didn’t know Amy . . . but I do know that her blog of fighting cancer was a huge inspiration for me as I fought my own battle with breast cancer. I was introduced to her website by my family in Michigan and feel like I got to know all of you through it. Your post today, Don, brought tears to my eyes as I know it is never easy to lose someone you love, let alone your wife and the mother of your child, sweet Theo. Praying for God’s comfort for you and Theo and wisdom as you continue to raise a boy that Amy would be proud of and that this blogging community is proud of as well. I know she’s proud of you too Don for your strength in how you are raising Theo and hope you will find comfort in your memories of Amy.

7 05 2014
Don

Thank you Leslie.

6 05 2014
Shelly dougherty

My heart breaks for you Donny.

7 05 2014
Don

😦

7 05 2014
meauoc

You have to be a very special man, Don, for Amy to entrust her child to you, and you are. You are the one she chose, the one she loved in her huge Amy way and the one she continues to be with. Don’t look for cardinals when it comes to you and Amy…just feel her with you whenever you think of her, talk of her, look at Theo or remember your time together. She is always with you. Always. You’re doing a great job. There is no timeline here, no right or wrong way to grieve. If we miss her the way we do, I cannot imagine how YOU miss her. My prayer for you is confidence and peace. Love you.

7 05 2014
Don

Thank you meauoc.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s




%d bloggers like this: